#ContactForm1{ display: none !important; }

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

New Year, Big Changes for {Not So} Single Girl in Everybody's Wedding World

In just about 12 hours, I can say I'm officially GETTING MARRIED this year.

2014 was a year of a lot of big changes in my life, mostly unexpected, some exciting, some plain ridiculous. 2015 is going to be about changes I want to make and things I want to do.

That said, one of my big 2015 goals is to [finally] finish writing my first draft of my book! As my days as Single Girl draw to a close, I feel it necessary to document some of my exploits in my memoir. Part of finishing that book is stepping up my blogging game, as I've failed so very miserably this past year.

And stepping up the blogging game means SGIEWW has finally moved to a real domain from that ridiculous Blogger URL! Here we are at NotSoSingleGirl.com where I plan to stick around for awhile.

Stay tuned in January for a whole lot more wedding chat and our very first contest and giveaway! I'm also looking for guest bloggers with your own wedding world story to tell. If you're interested, please email MoralesPartyofTwo@gmail.com to get on board.

Thank you to all of my loyal readers who have stuck around through the good, the absent and the Reddit incidents of 2012-2014.

May your 2015 be filled with as much champagne as I plan to consume this evening.


Monday, December 15, 2014

I found the gown! (and it was nothing like Say Yes to the Dress) #SorryNotSorry

Its true.

I found the gown.

I said yes to the dress.
Before you read the end of my wedding dress saga, I encourage you to read:
The story is still a bit different than the usual "I went to the boutique, I knew it was the one, and I bought it...and I loved it 8 months later". I wish it would've been that way to keep me from pulling my hair out and stressing eating fudge. But instead, I pulled my hair out and ate a ton of fudge.

I first tried on this gown back in October during a trip to Chicago for Amy's baby shower. Amy, my mom and I went dress shopping which lead a nightmare experience of basically not being able to get into any of their teeny tiny samples and being SO embarrassed until they lead me into a "plus size" room of 15 samples which were 10 or more sizes larger on me. I won't recount the tale any further but it remains, I said no to the shitty bridal boutique, not to the dresses.

I actually tried MY dress on right there in that plus size room, with tears streaming down my face in embarrassment still. The sample was so big that they had it clamped every place possible. I couldn’t even see the beauty in the dress with all of the turmoil.

Fast forward to earlier this month, I was at a boutique in Scottsdale trying to find a dress and I saw MY dress on the mannequin front and center in the store. I had them pull it and it was a size small, but I was able to wedge myself into enough to know that maybe I should have given this dress a chance previously. However, with a [Price Much Larger than Necessary and Far over the Budget] price tag, I wasn’t ready to make any rash decisions after I had come this far in the process.

The wedding dress search was quickly becoming a serious and calculated business. In and out of appointments. Identifying dresses on the hanger I'd already tried on and pass over. I consider myself an expert after 50+ dresses tried on. After a couple more boutique visits, I couldn’t even find a dress I wanted to try on. Nothing seems to top the dress I had already left behind twice. I started thinking about it more and more….having dreams about it…the obsession was growing.

The growing obsession is nothing new for me when it comes to shopping. Too often, I try on a pair of shoes and love them, but pass them up. For weeks, I think about them and the tension grows and grows until I MUST BUY THE SHOES. Sometimes they're sold out and sometimes not, but either way its meant to be, whatever the outcome. I felt basically the same about MY dress....but like 1000000x more obsessed.

So, I had to have the dress. Its over budget. It takes 9 months to order. It might cost a fortune to alter. DO. NOT. CARE. Must. Get. The. Dress. 

I hit the internet just to make sure I wasn’t being ripped off by an upscale bridal boutique (I always price check on all things in life) and just happened to find MY dress in MY size as a sample, on sale, at a bridal store in Idaho (of all places?) for [An Amount More Reasonable But Still More Than I'd Like to Admit]. If I paid in full up front, they would give me a two day grace period to decide if I wanted the dress...and if not, would allow me to return it for only the cost of shipping and a $30 restocking fee.

So, I did it. I bought the sample. And she got here two Fridays ago. I took it immediately to my seamstress who quoted me about $400 in minor alterations. The dress is in pristine condition and literally took my breath away. So, after much ado, I present, MY DRESS. Finally!

And in my hands. No waiting. Paid for in full. I could not be happier in this turn of events.

I'm just a blushing bride in a beautiful dress. TROLOLOLOL.

Please, bitches, you think I'm going to post a photo of the dress after all that?

It might not be the typical “Say Yes to the Dress” story, but certainly is quite the story, as all things in my life usually are. Expect a few blogs over the holidays as I have a lot of material I'm working with these days as wedding planning gets into full swing.


Friday, December 5, 2014

Always the bridesmaid, even when I'm a bride...

So, this blog was started because I was single and all my friends were getting married. Over the past couple of years, I have played a role in more than 7 weddings and attended more than 12 weddings. I expect to see this number rise over the next 5 years as more of my friends reach milestones in their life.

That said, when I got engaged in October, I was very excited to finally be the brides because I have some 27 dresses status shit going on in my closet (no, I have never re-worn a bridesmaid dress, no matter how cute it was for the wedding). What I did not predict when I got engaged was that I would be taking on several other important roles in 2015 as well.

First, I'd like to mention that my Matron of Honor, Amy, and Groomsman, Jared, gave birth to a beautiful baby girl on December 3rd. I've been bestowed the title of Godmother to little Summer Elizabeth, which is a huge honor after being Maid of Honor in their wedding just a little over a year ago. Something I knew was happening (clearly had 9 months to prepare), but was surprised at how excited I am to see that little girl over the holidays. I'm not a huge baby person, but I'm willing to make the exception for that cute little thang.

Second, I got asked to be a bridesmaid in my dear friend, Sasha's wedding over 4th of July weekend in Chicago. I was so surprised, but excited at the opportunity, but I had to be realistic with myself as to what it means to be a bridesmaid while also being the bride in my own pending nuptials. Was I ready to be both the Bridezilla we know and love AND bridesmaidzilla?

Nikki in her true form: Bridezilla and Bridesmaidzilla
I have to consider my relationship with the bride. While we have admittedly not been particularly close over the past couple of years due to my relocation to Phoenix, for almost a decade Sasha was one of my best friends who I spent a lot of time with. Even now, we make the effort to get together, even just for breakfast, whenever I'm in town. She has always been my cheerleader, no matter what bad decision I was planning to make. I absolutely felt honored to stand by her side on her wedding day.

What do I have to offer the Bride? Since I am far away from my hometown and also planning my own inconvenient wedding from afar, I have to expect I will not be able to make special trips for the bridal shower and bachelorette party, but will do my best to plan multiple activities on multiple weekends. To be clear, I want to be there but it is expensive and I have a big ass wedding of my own to pay for. I can only do my best.

What I will be lacking in physical presence, I have promised to make up for in advice, direction and opinions for the bride. Unlike myself, Sasha has been blissfully un-submerged in wedding culture up until this point. I sometimes wonder what sleep was like before I had wedding nightmares, primarily not about my own wedding. I wonder what possibilities my closet would hold without a rainbow of chiffon and satin dresses and if there is a year I will not awake dizzy with champagne after a night of twerking (lezbehonest-- never!!!) Sasha has no idea of the pain and anguish involved in wedding planning. The minute details that can basically ruin your whole day (OR YOUR ENTIRE WEDDING?!).

But I will teach her and help her and do all I can to make sure she never has to learn those lessons the hard way, because I've watched them and am now experiencing them myself.

That's all I can promise to do as her bridesmaid. Be present. Be helpful. Do my best.

So, that's it. I'm a bride and I'm a bridesmaid in 2015. Both happily unexpected. Going to be a very busy year for this lady, that's for sure. This weekend, I have an appointment to try on a wedding dress (yes, just one) followed by an appointment to try on bridesmaid dresses.

Call me crazy, but I'm thrilled to in this wedding world. Some things don't change, no matter how much life is changing for us.