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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

WTF Wednesday: HOLY SHIT.

Holy Shit.

Caution...this is a lot of information on my bodily functions.
So, I'm really not big on bodily functions. I do not appreciate burps, farts, poop chat or anything else. I know a lot of people are open about these things. For instance, Amy's fiance, Jared, loves to talk about his poop. He has gone as far as to photograph the deed and text it to his friends....he's that proud of it. My friend, Kyle, is also very open on the status of his bowel movements. He eats a ton of protein so this is plentiful as I learned after sharing a hotel room with him for a week in Hawaii. I, however, am not one to discuss this things, but really this story is truly WTF Wednesday approved.

As we all know, I've been working on my fitness. Up until now, I've been taking a multivitamin and such to make sure I'm getting all my nutrients and stuff up in my body. I was out of my normal vitamins and had nothing to do today, so I spent the morning reading up on what vitamins are recommended for weight loss and muscle strength for women. I made a list and promptly marched on over to Hi Health to pick up some new vita-goodies. 

I got all the stuff on my list, including a probiotic (which encourages digestive health) which was infused with castor oil. What is castor oil? Where have I heard this before? Oh yes, last week, Tiffany was telling me how castor oil is something that naturopathetic doctors use on pregnant women to induce labor naturally because it expels everything from your body, including babies. Perhaps this should have been when I put it back on the shelf.

But I didn't. So,  I came home around noon and took a handful of my new fancy vitamins including those castor oil probiotics. They're vitamins, what could they really do, right? Right. Uh huh.

So, I do Zumba from 6-7pm on Wednesday nights, but I had a fairly important phone interview scheduled right for 5:30pm. I decided to get to Zumba early, park, take my call and then go shake my ass off. On my way to Zumba, I started feeling a bit funny. Lots of tummy rumbling and churning. Hmmm, I thought. Maybe those vitamins were a bit much on my stomach. 

By the time my phone interview came, my stomach is literally biting me from the inside out. I felt those devil pills pounds on my intestinal system. I'm trying to focus on my phone interview and this lady's crazy detailed questions, and I'm literally sweating because my stomach is churning and cramping.

Seemingly it had subsided by Zumba time, so Zumba I did. Probiotics + Bounging around for an hour. Holy Shit. HOLY SHIT.

They say you have to celebrate the little things in life. Today, I'm celebrating that I did not shit my pants during Zumba...although I really thought I was going to.

These things only happen to me. Welcome to WTF Wednesday!

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