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Monday, October 22, 2012

Manic Mondays: Tales of a Psycho Ex Girlfriend

Let me take you back, wayyyy back to the days of wee Nikki...

As you all know, I am heading off to Honolulu on Saturday for a much, much needed vacation. This reminded me of a story from a longgggggggggg time ago. I think I was 14 or maybe 15, but certainly before I had a driver's license but definitely after the age I started getting immensely boy crazy. 

This is really just the buddings of so many psycho ex girlfriend tales to come, but man, it certainly was an indicator for future misgivings with men.

When Amy and I were 12 or 13, we met this guy named Steve at the local public pool. Steve was 15, pretty shy, pretty cute and soon Amy and he were "dating". Whatever that meant back then. In any event, we would all hang out and Steve would bring along his friend, Fitz. Fitz was a good guy, but not really my type at all. It was obvious after the first time I met him that I was certainly his type and he intended to pursue the situation.

After a variety of double dates and such, Amy and Steve were no more, but there was still Fitz and I...sort of. I pretty much knew I wasn't interested but hell, boyfriend is better than no boyfriend. WHERE DID I LEARN THAT BEHAVIOR? Seriously, like at what point did I decide having a boyfriend was SOOOO important that it was a top priority at 14. I blame the hormones.

Anyways, so around the time that Amy and Steve called it quits, Fitz was heading off to Hawaii and promised to bring me a necklace back as a souvenir.  Now, I did not want Fitz to be my long term boyfriend, or really even his friend (although I have kept in touch with Steve all through the years coincidentally), but I really, really wanted him to bring me back a necklace from Hawaii. I was like, obsessed, with getting this tiny token of affections. C'mon, we're teenagers, how nice could the thing be? Or never mind the dozens of other necklaces I had? It didn't matter. I wanted it. I needed it.

For weeks, I played out this ridiculous relationship on the promise of a necklace from an upcoming vacation....but it just wasn't in me. In my head, I was just going to see him once, get the necklace and then dump him. No biggie, right? After a week without him pestering me (since this was merely the dawn of the cell phone age), I realized I just couldn't be the gold digger I thought I was.

Nothing, not even a necklace, could keep me from moving on to the next hottie I met at teen night at the skating rink, not even a necklace from Hawaii.

So, upon arrival back home, I told him I just couldn't be with him. He whined, "But I got you the necklace!". I just shrugged it off, even though it killed me to do so. I wanted that damn necklace, but I didn't want him at all.

Cold, heartless, bitch at age 14. Le sigh.

Needless to say, I guess I did the right thing in the end, even thought I clearly shouldn't have been leading him on in hopes of acquiring a token of affection. I think I really hurt his feelings and that still doesn't feel good at all, but I did mend that broken heart by setting him up with the girl who lived across the street from me and drove me to volleyball practice, since they were the same age.

And they dated for an entire year. YOU'RE WELCOME. 

See? I have redeeming qualities sometimes.

P.S. She got the necklace he originally bought me and it wasn't even that pretty.

1 comment:

  1. lol, love this story, as the neighbor that you are talking about. The boy kinda stalked me, after I told him that I wasn't interested. Even into looking for me again on facebook, when the whole "find people from your past, even though there is a reason that they stopped being your friend in real life and don;t want to be your virtual friend either" came to be. Love the blog, just catching up, honored that a story of me made it into this. Thought of you when I came across some old pictures from summers of our childhood. Keep it up darling. You live the life all of us can envy. Your creativity is awesome. You should have a paypal set up so your readers can buy you a drink. lol