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Sunday, September 16, 2012

Sunday Date Review: A Tale of Two Brandon's

So, its been a long, hard week without blogging, and trust me, I have so many feelings caught inside me waiting to be expressed, its been just as hard on me as it has on you. But, never fear, take off your mourning veils and mend your broken hearts, I am back to my regularly scheduled blogging as I have fled Chicago and am back to my normal routine in Phoenix. And man, does it feel good.

 So, I returned late Thursday and have been trying to catch up on life, clean my apartment, not eat like shit and make sure everything went out the door for the product launch my company has on Monday. I have also been drinking excessively to cope with this stress, but alas, we'll call it catching up on happy hour since I haven't attended a single one in the past 3 weeks,

So, that brings us to Saturday. As you may recall, I was dating a guy I really like right because I took my 3 week hiatus to Chicago. As predicted, while I was gone, he all but stopped speaking to me, which is odd, since he was super into before I left. When I got back in town, I texted him and we made plans to go out Saturday.

In the mean time, the past few weeks, I've been on and off messaging with this other dude, also named Brandon, on OkCupid. He's very new to Phoenix, fairly new to single life and looking to make new friends. He's 32 and a web designer. At the very least I figured he could migrate my site onto a real web URL for a good price. So, since I was out of town and basically had no time to breathe, I kind of forgot about him, until he messaged me early Saturday afternoon while Tiffany and I were indulging in Turkey Chili and Dexter.

So, Brandon #2 is texting me asking what my plan is, so I figured it was about time to call up Brandon #1 and see if we were still on for Saturday as planned. He was working, doing inventory, and had no clue when he would be off work.

If you didn't know, the inability to make a plan (choose a time and plan, stick to it, etc) is MY NUMBER ONE PET PEEVE. IT INFURIATES ME BEYOND ALL OTHER THINGS. 

 I'm very high strung and do not like to go with the flow. SORRY I'M NOT SORRY.

So, now its mid afternoon, I'm irritated because Brandon #1 will not make a plan to save his life, so I agree to meet Brandon #2 at the Starbucks out the back door of my apartment complex. I'm already perturbed, so I'm not about getting pretty OR getting my in car to go somewhere to meet another asshole man. Brandon #2 happy obliged and 40 minutes later, we were drinking ice coffees and chatting away. Since Brandon #2 is not a weirdo and is actually very charming, funny and cute, I ask if he wants to go sit by the pool with my friends and have a few beers.

Like 3.5 hours later, we were still sitting by the pool chatting, so Brandon #2 asks if I want to go out to dinner, and I am more than happy that someone is willing to feed me tonight, because I still haven't done a single thing with the groceries I bought Friday and living on green apples and peanut butter isn't cutting it.

I check my phone, Brandon #1 texted me. Its now after 7pm and he is still working and "just getting dinner". OKAY, GUESS THAT MEANS WE'RE NOT GOING ON A DINNER DATE. At this point, I've decided Brandon #2 is a much better Saturday night option, because its clear Brandon #1 has ditched me (for the second time now) and I care so little, I cannot even be furious.

So, off to sushi and sake Brandon #2 and I go. It was a gorgeous night in Phoenix-- about 88 degrees and a little breeze. Perfect for sitting out on the patio at Kona Grill and hanging out...so that's what we did. Sometime during our dinner, Brandon #1 texted me that he just got off work (its about 10pm) and he's going to have to call it a night and he understand if I'm mad at him, but he's like to see me another night this week.

OKAY, SURE, DOUCHEBAG. Did he really think I was going to sit around all day and night Saturday waiting for him to make a plan? Because I wasn't and I didn't. The bottom line here is, he knew that this "make a plan" thing is my pet peeve and has now done it TWICE. That's pretty much the end of Brandon #1. I'm not reaching out to him to make a plan, and if he reaches out to me, perhaps I'll be free or maybe I'll leave him hanging like he did to me.

While we mourn the end of my very short infatuation with Brandon #1, let's see it as a sign that led me right into Brandon #2, who, if nothing else, will end up a really good friend because he's weird and quirky like me, and thinks my weird and quirky is adorbs. I'll take it.

Alright, seriously though, I will be back to normal blogging this week. Get ready for the ultimate Manic Monday coming tomorrow.

Happy Sunday, Bitches!


  1. You can pay $10 to Google and get a .com

  2. My biggest pet peeve ever is guys who can't just friggin' plan a date. How hard is it to say "Are you free on Thursday at 8pm?" Guys expect us to be available, but then they freak out when we're TOO available.

    I'm such a planner, so I have a hard time with girlfriends too, who say 'let's play it by ear' and then get pissed when I've made other plans.